Monday, June 26, 2017

Cold Feet


"Rosie, let's get married," my five year old said as they sat side by side licking ice cream cones. She put her arms around him and smiled.
"Okay, Drew!" she said sweetly. "Mommy! Drew and I are in love."
I smiled and felt my heart warm at the sweetness of this moment. "That's wonderful, babe. When is the wedding?"
Her face blanked and she looked to her brother/fiance for guidance. He was ready with an answer. "Let's do it now. I'll plan the whole thing, okay, Rosie?"
She finished off her ice cream cone, no longer interested in the conversation.

"You need invitations!" my oldest announced and the boys ran off to write it out.

I resisted the urge to point out that the finished invite didn't mention a date, time or even who was getting married. "Looks great, guys!"
"We need to make fifty copies to give to all of our friends and family," Drew said.
"Well, we would need to give friends and family a bit more notice if you want them to come.  How about we keep it small - just immediate family?" I suggested, trying to keep a straight face.
"That works," my practical oldest agreed.
"I am going to put Rosie down for a nap and you guys can finish up the wedding when she wakes up. Deal?"

"Okay! Let's make an aisle, Luke!" They ran off to tape miles of computer paper together and plan a menu of shrimp tacos and poopsicles (their boy word for fudgesicles). But their sister was not feeling the same level of enthusiasm.

I heard crying on her monitor and switched on the video to see what was wrong. I saw her tossing and turning and talking to Pooh Bear. "I can't get married, Pooh! I'm not ready to get married! I want to stay with my mommy and live with Mommy forever and ever. I can't do this!" It was a textbook case of cold feet. I went up the stairs to bring her a bit of comfort.

"Honey, it's okay. It's just a pretend wedding. It's a game. You don't have to leave Mommy." I hugged her close and wiped her little tears away.
"Mommy?" she said as she pulled away from the hug. "I just love you so much."
"I love you, too, sweet girl."

Sometimes we agree to things in the moment and then regret our decisions. Sometimes we over commit and our chest constricts at the thought of doing one. more. thing. My daughter reminded me today that it's okay to step away; it's okay to say no even when we've already said yes.

If you are feeling overwhelmed today, I challenge you to take a look at your commitments and your schedule. Is there something you can cancel? Is there something you've been asked to do but haven't had the courage to say no? Make the call, send the email, send the text. It's okay - We've all been there.

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